NP season 2 episode 12 Nanny vs. Daycare


Welcome to The Nanny Podcast, my name is Hanna Schaer from Riviera Nannies, I am your host today. I am so happy you are here :)


This week we are going to talk about some of the differences between nanny and daycare as childcare options. This is I suppose geared towards families making the choice, and can be helpful for nannies both as a perspective, but also to have a leg to stand on when negotiating and talking to a family.


Let’s jump right in :)


The first thing that we should talk about is the big elephant in the room, cost.


Having a private nanny for your child is most likely going to cost you a lot more than if they were in daycare. But not always. Depending on how many hours you do it will make more or less of a difference, but in general, a nanny is more expensive than daycare.


The second big question for me as a parent is how much your kid is going to be sick when they are little. There are many variables there, but in general a child in daycare is sick a lot more than one that is with a nanny. But of course, if you are lucky enough to find a daycare where parents don’t bring their kids when they are sick and follow good guidelines, then they might not be as sick as with a nanny who is not well versed in hygiene and illness prevention. But again, generally, for the first year or so, a kid in daycare is sick a lot more than one with a nanny, which might even end up costing you a lot more in lost work time, so a lot of the money saved putting a child in daycare might be lost in sickdays where you either miss work or have to get a, wait for it, nanny.


Getting your child socialized, able to make friends, share toys and function in a group happens organically in most daycares. But, on the other hand when you have a great nanny, he or she will be taking part in playgroups, meet with other kids, learn basic social skills, including good manners and interacting with others, so in this case I think it’s more a question of having a great nanny with an intentional routine, vs how it happens kind of on its own in daycare.


Making friends is closely related to socialization where your kids will make friends from an early age. Again this happens more organically in daycare, but with some organizing you can do the same things with the same kids every week, like music or dance lessons. It’s not really the same as spending all day together though, so if this is important, daycare has the advantage.


The last point I will go over is attention. Your child will get much more personalized attention with a nanny, and this has both advantages and disadvantages depending on your point of view. And again, with a skilled and experienced nanny it will never be an issue. I know kids who have grown up without siblings and with a nanny who are perfectly well adjusted and don’t have any of the possible issues anyone who thinks too much attention can create. A great nanny will meet your kids needs in a way no daycare really can.


So what do I think you should do? I think it really depends on your situation and your values. Ideally I think being with a full time care taker for the first few years of life is beneficial. Less stress, slower pace, more focus and attention. Then going into school goes seamlessly. And if being part of the daycare community where you live is important to you, then that’s what you should do. I come from a culture where people put their kids in daycare at age one. I would personally not make that choice, and didn’t, but it seems to work for lots of people. Even though they do complain a lot of how sick their kids are all the time, so there is that part too.


Nannies, when you are talking to families these are all points you can bring up when discussing their needs and how you can help them :)


Thank you so much for spending some time with me today, if you like the show please remember to subscribe and rate us. If you want to connect with me on social media I’m @rivieranannies on most platforms.


This week’s episode is brought to you by Mamatoto Radio. A brand new podcast where we talk motherhood, amazing mothers around the world tell their stories of motherhood. You do not want to miss it :)


Next week we are going to be talking about what a governess is. See you then :)

Nanny Podcast season 2 episode 11 “What do you ask when interviewing?”


Welcome to the Nanny Podcast, my name is Hanna Schaer from Riviera Nannies and I am your host today. I am so happy you are here :)


Today we are going to talk about what you ask when you are interviewing, either with an agency, or for a job.


I have a pretty radical view on collaborations that most people don’t have. Are you ready? I don’t believe in hierarchy. At least not in the traditional sense. I don’t think anyone is above or below, I think we all bring value and that it would benefit us all to see that value in each other.


So that’s my radical belief. What do you think?


Some people might think that when I say that they are welcome to sweep in and do whatever in my business, family or wherever we are moving. That’s not true. Lack of this particular structure does not mean lack of integrity. Just getting that out of the way.


So when I hire childcare it is with the understanding that they need a job, I need their service. When a client comes to me, they need a nanny, my business needs clients and we happen to provide what they need. We are in symbiosis. It is very tempting to try to take advantage of this situation, but it’s not a good idea. People like me will then move on. I can assure you, it’s not worth it.


So, what does this little speech have to do with the questions you ask when interviewing, you ask? Everything :)


During an interview, we are getting to know each other. Say for example you are interviewing with an agency, but it’s the same with a family, really. I am interviewing you, and you are interviewing me. With that comes a huge responsibility for both of us.


We both have to be open and honest. We both have to see how we fit. We both have to behave ourselves (who knows what repercussions burning a bridge has?).


So what questions do you want to ask?


Well that depends on what you want to know doesn’t it?


For the nannies and families that are registered with us you know that our intake is quite deep. I am not interested in the things you happily volunteer, I want to understand the answer to the question underneath so that I can serve you better. Place you in a better fitting family. Find you a better nanny.


So when you apply for a job, you should think about what your values are. Maybe write down your top five or so priorities. Is faith important to you? Is lifestyle important? What about parenting philosophy? Remember, you can only change you. Everyone else is off limits and you are not here to convince people they are something they know in their hearts they are not.


Write down what is important, and ask questions that get you the real answers. For example, if you ask someone if they like to eat healthy, that might mean something completely different to them. Instead, ask them what eating healthy looks like to them. Let them share their stories with you, let them show you and lead you to the answers you need.


Do you need long days? What is a long day?


Be as specific as you can while leaving as much room as possible in the answer to get to what you are looking for.


I am personally not a haggler and I always assume that when someone says something, for example what kind of salary they are looking for, or what a service costs, I go in with the notion that they understand that they are comfortable disqualifying themselves from all jobs with a lower salary. Just because I ask them or they say it, it doesn’t mean that job exists. I have had nannies say they want to earn 30 euros per hour, and I respect that, and at the same time I know that it’s not quite realistic for most jobs.


Thank you so much for spending time with me today. I would love to hear what you think, you can always email me at hello@rivieranannies.fr and put podcast in the subject line. And don’t forget to rate us if you like us where you listen to your podcast :)


This episode is brought to you by the Mamatoto community. It’s a free and wonderful community for mothers through pre conception, through pregnancy, birth and into motherhood. Join at mamatoto.info


Join me again next week when we will be talking about nanny vs. daycare. See you then :)

​Nanny Podcast season 2 episode 10 “Becky Sharp”


Welcome to the Nanny Podcast, my name is Hanna Schaer from Riviera Nannies and I am your host today. I am so happy you are here :)


I think imagining different fictional people in their jobs, why they are there, what kind of personalities they have and what brought them to where they are is really fun. So I thought, today we are going to talk about Becky Sharp, the fictional governess in Vanity Fair. Becky is thought to be a composite inspired by several real women. And that isn’t really surprising to me, what do you think?


Becky Sharp is the first time a governess was the main character of a story, she was poor without social status, and typically at the time her friend Amelia would have been the main character.


So Becky does something that with the tweaks and twirls of time and culture still happens today, doesn’t it? From a cynical point of view we can read her as being a ruthless opportunist who uses people as stepping stones in her quest to climb the social ladder to riches and glamour. I have seen it in the CVs I get from people from marginalized countries with no childcare experience who say “I will take any job in Monaco”. (just a side note, we do not work with people who are not in it with the same values we have, quality is king with us, so no thank you.)


From a less cynical and more modern and entrepreneurial perspective she disregards the social norms of the time and goes out to get what she wants. I see that too in CVs I get from people who tell me, I know I don’t have any childcare experience, can you please help me build my CV to be a nanny. For those people, I am happy to see if I can help.


We touch on this in different scenarios of nanny placement. Everyone loves a love story, but I personally don’t love opportunism, and the way I read Becky Sharp is as an opportunist, mostly, who doesn’t care too much, if at all, who she hurts along the way to what she wants, or thinks she wants. Being a governess is a serious and really important job, not a stepping stone to marry the dad in the family. Or is it?


Remember a few weeks ago when we talked about families who want to hire an ugly nanny. Lots of you were outraged on Instagram, and this is probably one of the reasons we ever get requests like that. If there weren’t men naive and stupid enough to cheat on their wives ever chance they got, and if there weren’t women who didn’t think twice about destroying a family, going for what they want, would we get requests like that?


You can always trace it back at least one step backwards, and just for fun, let’s do it. In Becky’s case, I think she was driven by a combination of unfulfilled fantasies and a desire to be all the things she dreamed of and thought she should have. In a modern marriage there are a lot less definitive no gos as long as all parties are aligned, so somehow the request for unattractive childcare for your kids should sometime soon become anachronistic and not really fit in with how we communicate and collaborate as couples and families. But I get it, I have seen Becky’s and I don’t like it. At the same time with honest intentions I do think people and women especially should go out and follow their dreams. So where do we land?


The point is that you can read Becky in different ways, and there is lots of literary analysis done on her persona and on the work itself. If you haven’t read the book or seen the film, I would recommend it.


I would love to hear what you think of Becky’s and other personality types :) email me at hello@rivieranannies.fr and put podcast in the subject line.




Thank you for spending some time with me today. This week’s episode is brought to you by Mamatoto Nannies, the sister company to Riviera Nannies that places domestic staff to VIP families worldwide. Visit mamatoto.info to learn more about both registering as nannies and families.


Don’t forget to rate us if you like the podcast and to follow us on social media @rivieranannies Next week we are going to talk about what to ask when you are interviewing. See you then :)

​Nanny Podcast season 2 episode 8 “Mary Poppins”


Welcome to the Nanny Podcast, my name is Hanna Schaer from Riviera Nannies and I am your host today. I am so happy you are here :)


Today we are going to talk about Mary Poppins, the fictional super nanny that we have followed on her mission and adventures in two movies now, based on the books by P. L Travers. Disney has brought the stories to the big screen and into our homes in the most Disney of ways.


I hadn’t watched the first movie until a few years before I started Riviera Nannies. I had a friend who just couldn’t believe that I hadn’t watched it and it kind of became an event between us when I did. Thank you James for insisting I watch it and for introducing me to the amazing world of Mary Poppins :)


I think there are so many things in Mary Poppins that are great guiding principles for both parents and nannies, so many lessons and learning moments in big and small things. I definitely feel both inspired and validated as an adult spending a lot of time with kids after watching Mary Poppins.


Let’s talk about a few awesome things :)


The Mary Poppins films talk about how sometimes it takes a team to raise kids, and there is no shame in that. In the two films they address the change in nanny culture, in “Mary Poppins Returns” we hear that nobody hires nannies anymore, and the idea that the relationship between nanny and family is one that both nanny and family needs is mentioned. I think that’s something we don’t talk a lot about, not from that angle. When you question the constellation of relationships I think you are approaching how amazing and humble really deep and real relationships can be. Acknowledging that we both need each other is a start.


How helping people to figure out what they need to do by gentle suggestion can be the most effective way. Mary Poppins is clever, suggestive and never aggressive. She plants ideas with people and let them figure it out themselves. Isn’t that what we do on our best parenting days? See, hear and observe our kids and nudge them in the right direction? There is a deep calm in this kind of leadership. A confidence and level of respect for others. When we give others the space to be their best selves that’s pretty beautiful, isn’t it? I think it applies to all kinds of relationships we have, don’t you?


How discipline and good education is not in opposition to a rich imagination. Well behaved kids are not curbed kids, or don’t have to be. Being smart and well educated and letting your imagination take you on the most exciting adventures is possible even when you do your chores and learn how to be a contributing part of your family. Every day events turn into adventures when you dive into the bath tub during bath tub and go on an adventure.


Insisting on magic in your life is a great path to your ethics, morals and your education. Learning right from wrong, and how to not only see right from wrong, but being able to identifying and fighting for what is right, with all the magic and the beautiful places you go in your imagination is again one of the pillars of not only great but amazing parenting and nannying. I am thinking of the movie Life is Beautiful and all the stories through history where grown ups have used the imagination and magic to not only cope but to thrive. Allowing yourself to go with your imagination, creativity and follow your heart without judgement is such a powerful lesson, both for us and the kids. Don’t you think?


It’s about being a rebel, fighting for what is right. I love how the slow, steady and unapologetic the call for rebellion is. Maybe I am reading a lot into this, but I love a rebel, I love someone who decides to do what’s right even when it’s not within the rules or convention. I love a sincere protest and standing up to the man. I feel like Mary Poppins is raising free thinking rebels who are not afraid to protest, and I like that very much personally. Isn’t that what we all want for our kids? I know I do :)


And then there are all the stories that help you through difficult things. Giving kids stories to hold on to, letting them know that they are not alone and that the hard thing they are experiencing will be survived is always a strong message in children’s books, and no less in the teaching of Mary Poppins. There is so much to learn from all of our favorite nanny, and I wish that we could all be so open and willing to see and hear how much we would all benefit from a slower pace, more rebellion and good manners.


Thank you so much for spending some time with me today. Today’s episode is brought to you by the Mamatoto Pregnancy and Birth course from Mamatoto, the community for conscious mothers where support and community is everything. Take a look at mamatoto.info and see how they can support you.


If you haven’t already, head over to our instagram and follow us at @riveranannies. See you next time when we will talk about showing our kids, not telling our kids. See you then. Bye :)

Nanny Podcast season 2 episode 7 “Ending a job”


Welcome to this week’s episode of The Nanny Podcast, my name is Hanna Schaer from Riviera Nannies and I am your host. I am so happy you are here.




Today we are going to talk about ending a job. We get questions about this from nannies from time to time, often from nannies we haven’t placed.


This might sound strange, but how you will end your job has a lot to do with how you started it. Did you feel a good connection with the family? Did you feel like you had a good and honest line of communication?


Ok, so let’s break it down.


You want to end a job. There are lots of reasons why people want to end a job. Let’s say you have decided that you want to take your career in a different direction and you want to look for a job that is a better fit for you.


Of course it could also be that you want to earn more money, that you want to work different hours and you want your tasks to be different.


Then maybe you don’t want to end the job bur rather renegotiate the terms of the job.


Assume you have a good communication and relationship with your family. And you have a contract in place. The importance of a contract has so much nuance. It is an agreement between you and your employer, they know what they can expect from you, and you know what you can expect from them. You have agreed on terms and it is very important that you keep them. It is as important that you honor the salary you have agreed on and don’t go asking for more a few weeks into the job (the time for renegotiating the salary can be in your agreement too) as it is that your family doesn’t start asking you to do things you have not agreed to do, like tasks not related to the kids, unless you have renegotiated the terms of the new work. You see where I am going with this.


If all those things are in place, having a conversation around ending your job might be a difficult conversation from an emotional perspective, but with agreed terms for how long ahead of time you give notice and so on, there aren’t any surprises.


From the nannies who come to us for advice, I know that most people do not set themselves up this way.


This is why it is so important from the beginning that you work with families that share your values, that see your value and that you respect and who respect you.


So if you don’t have that relationship with your family today, there are steps to take. Have very clear agreements. Just as a very basic start, what are the hours you work? What do you get compensated for that time? What happens if you work more, how are you compensated then? What are your tasks? If they want to renegotiate the tasks, you have to bring it up, either say, I am not comfortable doing this task, I am hired to do xyz, or say, with the added work responsibility I would like to talk about how I will be further compensated.


So when you want to end a job, be courteous, be kind, be respectful. Know before hand what you want, so that if you end up in a situation of negotiation where the family might want to keep you with different terms, you know what you want and where your boundaries are. Allow for their feelings and reactions and remember that they have nothing to do with you, it is about how they are feeling. There might be a moment of panic, looking for a new nanny is hard and emotional. Maybe they feel overwhelmed. That is not on you, but you have the option of creating the space for them to end on good terms.


Speaking of ending on good terms, do it. You might need the references, but it is just good manners and good human behavior to try to not end relationships badly if you can help it.




Thank you so much for listening and spending some time with me today.


If you have any comments on today’s episode, if you would like to ask any questions or if you just want to say hi, you can always email me at hello@rivieranannies.fr and put podcast in the subject line. I love hearing from you :)


Today’s episode is brought to you by Mamatoto, the place where mothers go for education, support and connection. It’s a great place to learn about prenatal nutrition, take courses to prepare for pregnancy and birth and find support into motherhood. Check them out at mamatoto.info